Ice Fishing with the Papa...

Yesterday I worked all day and came home to an empty house. Andy and the kids had gone ice fishing all day and then a party in the evening. The camera was plugged in and these pictures were on the computer when I came home. I feel so thankful that my kids get to have Andy for a dad. They go on so many outdoor adventures. It is just what I would hope my kids are doing when I am not around.

I really should go ice fishing with them sometime. It looks like such a peaceful sport.

Esther, the Sun and Me

Today the sun warmed our house...joined forces with our wood stove heat and made me hot and sweaty while I did my morning chores. Esther and I had a quiet morning together. She played, I washed dishes. We made flax muffins ...and when we finally got outside we realised it was just like a spring day! She rode her bike and I walked along with her taking in the beauty of the day. A random dog came along...tongue hanging out. He was happy and free.
We decided to have a little tea party on the front porch. Esther Maple is always thrilled about tea. Especially if she gets to do all the pouring.

We both wore our sunglasses and just basked.

Beautiful day. Thank you sun.

Alas...

Today I am missing our dear friend Summer.

 Oh Summer, How I miss you.  But alas, It is still January 22.

Not Permanantly Deleted...

I would like to apologise for deleting the blog...it was not my intention to do away with it. I just had to fix the format and buy more picture space through google.

Thanks so much for your patience! :)

All is well.

His Spirit...

Again and again I have gone back to reading these and other parenting books...

Oh man, the books. The Indigo Children is a new read, and I don't like it. The one missing from the pile is Buddhism for Mothers. That one has saved me many a short fuse and all of these have given me some perspective. None of them have ever made my role as a mother less stressful. I have Waldorf Parenting books that I like as well, but none of them seem to acknowledge how difficult children can be at times, and how hard it is on everyone. "Be the Sun". Beautiful, but not always realistic.

Harvest has always been what I choose to refer to as, "My Spirited Child." On a day that I am feeling immense stress I might tell you that he is difficult, or defiant, or contrary...extremely intense. I don't like to label him in a negative way, so "spirited" is what I prefer to say when any description is needed at all. We have had our ups and downs for sure...lately we are really digging deep for the nice moments and loving them because most moments with him have been more than hard this week. I would say this about his whole toddler hood and childhood to this point but it would make me cry, so I won't.

This beautiful boy has an incredibly passionate spirit...one that could only be sent to me as a test, a life lesson and a very special gift too. I feel both very blessed and exhausted. I feel very proud, and very worried. I love him so fiercely....just as fiercely as he feels about everything in his world. Much more actually.

Right now my goals are to get through the days and both nurture myself and remain a firm but peaceful guide for both children. This doesn't always happen. When some days are finally over I finally look in the mirror to find a very dishevelled self. Messy hair, eyes tired and bloodshot, flour, food and soot on my clothes and a very sad feeling that I failed that day in being the mother I want to be. I pour a glass of wine and take a bath to nurture myself...tell myself that I can't be perfect and set new goals for the next day. Sometimes I cry, sometimes I can only just laugh.

There is so much that I never could have prepared myself for when I became a mother....not a single person could have prepared me for what was to come. Not because my life is extraordinary, but because it is my unique life as a mother with so many things that make it what it is. It is a mixture of who I am, what I need, who my spouse is, what he needs, who each child is and what they each need...what kind of an environment we live in and what our standards are.

Oh Harvest, you are larger than life. I will never hope to break your beautiful spirit or change you in any way...but I will rejoice when you grow into some of these traits and tame yourself on your own terms. You really are so little still.

Yesterday I heard his little honkish voice say, "Mama, take a picture of us!" I of course grabbed the camera and look at them from the cameras view. Such beautiful love they have for each other and the world around them.

So blessed I am. And tired.  

Blueberry Coconut Flour Muffins...

Today I decided to use my coconut flour to bake something tasty and I settled on these Blueberry muffins. 

I am slightly intolerant to wheat...a recent discovery. So, I have not been cooking with any flours at all...I really would prefer to stick with whole foods....except I have learned that coconut flour makes some of the best things. Pancakes even.

Coconut Four Blueberry Muffins (Makes 12 large muffins) I doubled it because six muffins is hardly enough.

6 eggs
6 Tablespoons of melted virgin coconut oil
6 Tablespoons of raw honey
1/4 teaspoon of Almond Extract (I used vanilla)
1/2 teaspoon of sea salt
1/2 cup of coconut flour
1 Teaspoon of Baking Powder (or more if you want them fluffy)
1 Cup of Fresh or Frozen Blueberries

Preheat oven to 400 Degrees

Melt the coconut oil in a pan on the stove on low heat. It melts quickly, so keep an eye.

Blend all ingredients (excepting the berries) in a food processor or blender until smooth.

Fold in the Blueberries

Pour the batter into 12 lined muffin cups.

Bake Until slightly brown on top. The recipe says 16 minutes but mine took more like 22 minutes. Just keep an eye on them and keep feeling the tops.

These are amazing. Only let them cool for a short while. Put butter on the top and enjoy while they are warm. They are fluffy and incredibly delicious with the perfect amount of coconut flavor.

I am feeling very thankful today. Yesterday I was very sick and slept all day. Today I am all better with lots of energy to spare. I am feeling thankful for my quick recovery and for all that we have. As I was helping Andy bring in armful after armful of wood today I didn't feel sorry for myself for having to work hard in the cold. I felt so increbibly thankful that we have enough wood to keep our babies warm all winter.

Peace to all of you that visit me here!

Still Here!

We are still here, enjoying life. I don't have much to report. We have had lots of cold weather, and I find that the more we hole ourselves up inside the grumpier we become. We need the fresh air and natural elements. For this reason, it has to be REALLY cold to keep us in for the day. We bundle up and stay active sledding, walking, running, snow shoeing, skating, laughing....

My little winter boy. He loves the snow and cold so much and plays outside constantly. When he starts to get testy or stir crazy I get him bundled up and send him out. He fights with me sometimes, but once he is out he is at peace!

This fuzzy dark picture doesn't even begin to cover the adorable image of my smiley pink cheeked little Eskimo girl. :) I wish you could see her through my eyes, but I know you never could. She doesn't prefer winter, but she still has fun anyway. She tells me every day that she wishes it was summer so that she could go to the beach and eat ice cream. I feel the same way but I try to stay positive about every season. We could never wish any of our four beautiful seasons to go away. They bless our lives so richly. :)

And...these orange kittens are more work than I imagined they would be. Most of it is pretty typical of kitten stuff, but I get very frustrated. They break things, knock over plants and spill plant soil all over the ground, poop in it, wipe their poopy butts on the wall, ruin everything (my least favorite would be my scratched up 1000 thread count sheets grrrr) they wake everyone up EARLY in the morning and we have recently had to close them in our tiny bathroom before they wake everyone up. Our kids typically get up at 5:30ish and we are talking earlier than that by a lot. This is a picture of Fox stuck in our ceiling. He keeps doing it, and we can't even figure out how he is getting in. I have had to remove this tile OVER and OVER again to help him out. They are adorable, but not very smart. I think it will pay off in the spring when they can go outdoors all the time and also when they start killing mice. :) We do love them!

Anyway, just wanted to drop in and say hi. I hope you are all loving life!

Teaching a five year old to knit...

Yesterday morning and this morning I spent some time teaching five year old Harvest to knit. He has a short attention span and I have to teach him right handed knitting when I am a left handed knitter but it is really fun. He loves it! I sit him between my legs and our hands do it together. He likes me to firmly and deliberately lead his hands through the steps. Today I told him that pretty soon he won't need my hands at all!

I bought him the most adorable knitting needles in the world. :)

Happy Solstice!

Warmest Wishes Everyone! Love and light!

We are having an incredible Solstice and we have so much more fun to come in the next few days. Lots of visiting, traveling and celebrating! I am going to check out of this space until Monday. Happy Solstice, Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy New Year! To all of you, whatever you celebrate I wish you the best. Be safe and enjoy.

love Hannah

Chai Solstice Cookies

I wanted to share a recipe for chai spice cookies that we make every year on or around Winter Solstice. They are my favorite cookies. :)

Chai Solstice Cookies

• 2 Chai Tea bags (I do decaf)
• 3 cups  all-purpose flour
• 1 tsp Cinnamon, 1/2 tsp ginger and 1/2 tsp nutmeg
• 1-1/2 cups  butter, softened
• 1 cup  sugar
• 2  egg yolks
• 2 Tbsp of maple syrup (or molasses)
• Icing made from powdered sugar, milk and vanilla

  
  

  1) In a smallish bowl mix together the chai tea from the bags, the flour and the 3 spices. 

  2) Cream together the butter and sugar. I use my food processor and the dough attachment that comes with it. 

  3) Add the egg yolks and the maple syrup. When it becomes a workable dough, put it in the refrigerator covered for up to 2 hours. I only do about an hour.

  4) Roll them out with additional flour, cut them out and bake at 350 degrees for 8-10 minutes. When they are cool, put the icing on top. Enjoy!